Monday, March 29, 2010

What is the real story behind the free television set found this weekend on Putnam Street?

Article by Beak Wilder / Photo courtesy of a cell phone in Merrymount

A free television set was found on Putnam Street over the weekend, causing many residents of the area to wonder what might be wrong with it.

The impressive 20" RCA television set was found by local man-about-town, Stanley Rhubarb, who, after staring at it for nearly an hour, decided that it must be too good to be true, causing him to immediately alert media sources regarding the situation before darting off into the patch of wilderness behind Central Middle School.

"The sign says that the TV is free," Rhubarb told reporters. "But why?"

Rhubarb then went on to describe in great detail several theories he had, each of them more mind-blowing than the last.

He was then sedated by a nearby doctor, who, after a series of very specific medical questions, finally admitted that he was "not technically a doctor."

It remains unclear at this time as to where this man went, although some have speculated that he, too, darted off towards the patch of wilderness behind Central, where he was then given a black leather jacket and raised by Del Tufos.

"There's no such thing as a free TV," Rhubarb added, as he casually looked over his right shoulder. "If these people think I'm gonna lug this thing all the way to my apartment and plug it in, they got another thing comin'. Stanley Rhubarb may not be the brightest bulb in the bucket, but at least I know what time it is."

At this point, there is no further information known regarding this mysterious television set, nor are the circumstances from which it came about known.


Matty Hammers said...

That note leads me to believe that there's more to this than merely a state of the 90s picture quality. I think it's trying to tell you that that TV is full of needles just perfect for injecting heroin into one's self at no charge to the savvy consumer.

radek said...

"given a black leather jacket and raised by Del Tufos" haha!

Herb Chambers said...

There is another "Radek". He lives in Baltimore. I learned this over the weekend.

mike starr said...

Raised by del tufos is the only way to go, and good luck with the leather jacket its really the only way to roll in that part of quincy near the del tufos