Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Joe Piscopo impersonator conjures up bad memories for locals, has residents on edge

Article by Beak Wilder / Photo courtesy of the World Wide Web

A Joe Piscopo impersonator has created quite a stir among locals, causing many residents to rethink what form of entertainment they will allow in the Granite City.

The impersonator, who was said to look and act so much like the former SNL comedian that it was described as "chilling," was eventually asked to leave before completing his second act, although was reported to receive full compensation.

Visibly shaken, the impersonator appeared to be too bewildered to comment.

While it is a well-known fact that Joe Piscopo is not allowed within Quincy city limits, there is speculation as to why, exactly, this rule came about in the first place.

Some say it is a torrid tale of lust and betrayal, others aren't quite so sure.

"It was scary how much that man looked like Joe Piscopo," remarked Davey Goodness, an Easton resident who attended the event with his mother. "I don't know what Quincy's deal with Joe Piscopo is, but they obviously weren't ready for this. It was too real, too authentic. I'll never forget those cold, piercing eyes."

When asked the reason why Piscopo is not allowed to penetrate the Quincy border, City Hall claimed to have conveniently "misplaced his file."

"We don't talk about Joe Piscopo," claimed Eileen Donna Milkshake, a domestic engineer from Squantum. "I have no idea why we even thought we could handle this shit. There's too much bad blood. It was all just too much, too soon."

Joe Piscopo was unavailable for comment on this article, as his website and contact information were listed as "currently down for construction."

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